As someone who doesn’t qualify for any form of government assistance, I have grown accustomed to paying for services I’ll never use. Until today. In the mail I received a very nice trifold brochure from Cal Fire reminding me that I’ll need to perform a defensible space checklist at my home in Pebble Beach.
So now I see where all the money goes. Thank you residents of El Dorado County for paying for this flyer to help educate poor, uh rich, people who have vacation homes there. Now I feel emboldened to cut down that bothersome branch which always seems to be in my way at Monterrey Peninsula Country Club golf course.
It is nice to know that for the low price of just $150 a year you all can sleep better at night, just knowing that people like Charles Schwab, Clint Eastwood, Richie Rich and myself can be better informed regarding fire safety. All snugly in our multimillion-dollar mansions.
For those who might think this to be an unnecessary expenditure for an unfair burdensome tax program, well welcome to my world people!
I don’t want to sound ungrateful, for this is a fine gesture. But maybe next year you can send it directly to my landscaper? For expediency’s sake.
A little inside information: I don’t do lawns.