Heard over the back fence: Maybe you need ‘herd insurance’

By From page B1 | May 02, 2014

WHO’S TO BLAME? My friend Paul Chafer forwarded the following church sign: “Adam blamed Eve — Eve blamed the snake—- and the snake didn’t have a leg to stand on.”

4-H ANIMALS ARE LOOSE! 4-H members need help to “Round up the Herd.” From May 10 to June 11, 4-H members will be asking businesses to “herd” animals by displaying animal cut-outs for three days during the El Dorado County Fair from June 12-15 and then “Herd Removal” will come by and pick up the cut-outs. You can support 4-H in the following ways: Order the herd for your business; send the herd to an associate; purchase “Herd Insurance” to ensure no stampede will visit your business. To order your “herd” cut-outs, contact the 4-H desk at 530-621-5503 or email [email protected].

REMEMBER JUDY GARLAND: The “Sensational Singing Seniors” will present a free musical show titled “Remembering Judy Garland” at the following locations:  Tuesday, May 6, at 1 p.m. at the El Dorado Hills Senior Center Thursday, May 8, at 2 p.m. at Placerville Senior Center.

GO BELOW FOR ANSWER: Someone named “Bob” forwarded the following “Top Moron” story: Last summer, down on Lake Isabella, located in the high desert, an hour east of Bakersfield, some folks, new to boating, were having a problem. No matter how hard they tried, they couldn’t get their brand new 22-foot boat going. It was very sluggish in almost every maneuver, no matter how much power they applied. After about an hour of trying to make it go, they putted into a nearby marina, thinking someone there may be able to tell them what was wrong. A thorough topside check revealed everything in perfect working condition. The engine ran fine, the out-drive went up and down, and the propeller was the correct size and pitch. So, one of the marina guys jumped in the water to check underneath. He came up choking on water, he was laughing so hard. NOW REMEMBER . . . THIS IS TRUE. Under the boat, still strapped securely in place, was the trailer!”

TIP-A-COP FUNDRAISER: On Thursday, May 15, the El Dorado County Sheriff’s Dept. and Applebee’s Restaurant, 3281 Coach Lane, Cameron Park, will join forces with the El Dorado Special Olympics program for a “Tip-A-Cop” fundraiser. Sheriff’s personnel will team up with local Special Olympic athletes at the lunch and dinner shifts to work for “special tips” to fund the El Dorado Special Olympics 2014 Sports and Training Programs.

CARING FOR THE CAREGIVER: On Tuesday, May 13, at 1 p.m., a presentation titled “Caring for the Caregiver” will be offered at the El Dorado Hills Senior Center, 990 Lassen Lane. Participants will learn the signs of stress and caregiver burnout and the tools and resources to manage stress.

NEW PARK AND RIDE STOP: The following information was sent by El Dorado Transit: El Dorado Transit now serves the Vine Street and Mercedes Lane park and ride lot by the Regal Cinemas in Town Center. This stop has been implemented in response to overcrowding at the current El Dorado Hills Town Center Park and Ride Lot on Post Street at White Rock Rd. The Vine Mercedes stop will be served by El Dorado Transit Commuter routes 10 (7:10 a.m.), 12 (7:30 a.m) and 7 (8.35 a.m.) in the mornings and by routes 12, 5 and 6 in the afternoons.

OUT LOUD POETRY: The “Poetry off the Shelves” group meets on the second Wednesday of each month from 6 to 7 p.m. at the Placerville Main Library, 345 Fair Lane. Participants can read their original poetry, poetry of their favorite poets, or simply come to listen. Drop-ins are welcome.

NOT QUITE ADEQUATE: Sarah St. John provided the following comment by a teacher on a student’s report card: “Your child has delusions of adequacy.”

HANGTOWN CAR SHOW: The annual Hangtown Car Show is scheduled for Sunday, May 18, from 9 a.m. to 3 p.m. on Historic Main St., Placerville. Admission and parking are free for spectators. For more information and how to show your car, call Mike at 530-622-1731.

SPRING FLING TEA: The Dogwood Garden Club and Pollock Pines Friends of the Library invite the community to attend their “Spring Fling Tea” noon May 23 at Smith Flat House, 2021 Smith Flat Rd., Placerville. The cost is $35 per person, and ticket deadline is May 12. For tickets, make your check payable to PPFOL and mail to: Rebecca McIntyre, 6395 Pony Express Trail, Pollock Pines 95726. More info: Becky McIntyre, [email protected], 530-306-4405.

SPEECH CANCELED: The El Dorado County/Placerville Parkinson’s Disease Support Group will meet on May 6 from 1:30 to 3 p.m. in the dining room of the El Dorado County Senior Center, 937 Spring St., Placerville. However, the scheduled speaker, Pam Markee, cannot make it to the meeting.

A ZEN ZINGER: A glance at the “Zen” calendar reviews the following quote: “AWARENESS. The Buddha’s reply when asked to sum up his teaching in a single word.”

Send your jokes and event items for Heard Over the Back Fence column three weeks in advance to Bob Billingsley at the Mountain Democrat, PO Box 1088, Placerville 95667, or drop them off at 2889 Ray Lawyer Dr. First and last name of contact person are required. Phone 530-344-5036. Follow @BBillingsleyMtDemo on Twitter.

Bob Billingsley

Bob Billingsley writes Heard Over the Back Fence three times a week, keeping his pen on the pulse of the community. He also writes a biweekly column called Billingsley's Bullets, in which he uses “sideways” thinking to make your day a little easier to handle.
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