HUSBAND EXAGGERATION: Jewel Blair-Smith forwarded the following “A Few Good Smiles” quote: “A husband is someone who, after taking the trash out, gives the impression he just cleaned the whole house.”
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20-MILE TASTE FUNDRAISER: We received the following announcement regarding this fundraiser: “Please join us at the second annual “20-Mile Taste” fundraising event to be held on Saturday, Aug. 16, at the beautiful Davies Family Inn at Shadowridge Ranch in Placerville. This evening event will celebrate local agriculture, featuring pairings of delectable dishes and wine and beer sourced from a 20-mile radius of our event. Building on the sold-out success of last year, 20-Mile Taste 2014 will be an evening to remember. To purchase tickets, go to Ag in the Classroom’s website: agintheclass-edc.org.”
TEEN AFTER SCHOOL PROGRAM: The “Teen (agers) after School Program” starts Aug. 13. The cost is $20 per month or $185 per year. Looking for a place to go after school? Come hang with friends, get your homework done, play pool, play games with friends or get involved in the community. To register for this program, call 916-933-6624.
GIVE BLOOD – SEE MOVIE: A blood drive is scheduled for Thursday, Aug. 14, from noon to 6 p.m. at the Regal Cinema El Dorado Hills Stadium 14 Theater, 2101 Vine St. Bloodmobiles will be in the parking lot. Donors must bring a photo ID. Drink plenty of fluids before donating. Potential marrow donors can register for “Be the Match” through Blood Source. Walk-ins are welcome. Donors receive one free movie pass.
FLEA MARKET IN THE PINES: On Saturday, Aug. 16, from 8 a.m. to 3 p.m., the Pollock Pines Community Flea Market will be held at the El Dorado Savings Bank parking lot in Pollock Pines. For more information, visit www.pollockpines-caminorotary.org.
DEALING WITH WAITING: Jewel Blair-Smith sent the following “Life Hacks” quote: “Listening to music literally changes your brain’s perception of time and reduces the amount of time you think you’re waiting.”
ADULT GOLF CLINIC: The El Dorado Hills Community Services District offers an Adult Golf Clinic in their recreation guide. The clinic will be available on Sunday, Aug. 17, from 9:30 to 11:30 a.m. at Apple Mountain Golf Resort, 3455 Carson Rd., Camino. Ages 18 and up are invited. The class fee is $44. This class is for beginners wanting to learn how to play and those who want to review fundamentals and shot-making techniques. For more information, contact Instructor Mark Hoshall at 916-370-0346. To register for this class, call 916-933-6624.
LEARN TO SQUARE DANCE: On Thursday, Aug. 21, from 6:45 to 9 p.m., a free “Introduction to Square Dance Party” is offered at the IOOF Hall (upstairs), 467 Main St., Placerville. No experience is necessary. Singles and couples, ages 13 and older, are invited. Dress casually. For more information, call 530-644-1709 or 530-313-8439.
LEAVE THE KIDS HOME: If you read the book “Live and Learn and Pass It On,” you will discover the following life lesson: “I’ve learned that when my wife and I finally get a night out without the kids, we spend most of the time talking about the kids.” — Age 29
READY TO KAYAK? A class titled “Kayaking for Boomers” is scheduled for Sunday, Aug. 17, from 11 a.m. to 2 p.m. at Lake Natoma, 1901 Hazel Ave., Gold River. The class description states, “Kayaking is great for fitness and easy on the body.” The class fee is $73. To register for this class, call 916-933-6624. This class is designed for those 50 years old or older.
LIVE RIGHT NOW: John Bruno forwarded the following “Seize the Day” thought. “Live today. Not yesterday – not tomorrow. Just today. Inhabit your moments. Don’t rent them out to tomorrow.” — Jerry Spinelli
GET OUT OF YOUR EASY CHAIR! A class titled “Fit 4 Life” is offered on Mondays and Wednesdays from 8 to 9 a.m. at the El Dorado Hills Senior Center, 990 Lassen Lane. This class is perfect for those who are “active aging.” An effective and balanced low impact workout that combines cardio strength, balance and some core work. Bring a mat and water. You can try out a class for free. The class fee is $50 for a 10-class punch card or $80 for a 20-class punch card. To register for class, call 916-358-3575.
THE TRAIN IS LEAVING: The El Dorado Western Railroad is offering train rides every Sunday, weather permitting. The first ride leaves at noon. The last ride leaves at 3:15 p.m. A $5 donation for ages 9 and up, and $3 for ages 3 to 8, is appreciated. The Aug. 24 train will be boarding in Shingle Springs at 4241 Mother Lode Dr.
FALL CLASSES GUIDE: The El Dorado Hills Community Service District’s Fall Guide for classes being offered is now available. The guide will be mailed out to EDH residents. Copies will also be available at the registration office. Register online, by phone at 916-933-6624, by fax at 916-941-1627 or come by the office at 1021 Harvard Way, Monday-Friday, 8 a.m. to 5 p.m.
REMEMBERING MILLIE: I was sad to read that Millie Smith recently died. She was 94 years old, but you wouldn’t have believed it. Her energy and her compassion were endless. When I was around Millie, I always felt great. Thank you, Millie, for being you.
POLLOCK PINES LIBRARY OPEN HOUSE: The Pollock Pines Friends of the Library are hosting an open house to celebrate the completion of the “Library Outdoor Reading Area Project.” The open house will be on Sept. 9 from 4 to 6 p.m. at the Pollock Pines Library, 6210 Pony Express Trail. Refreshments will be served.
CHECK OUT THE ANTIQUES: For you plan-aheaders, the “Antique Street Fair” is scheduled for Sunday, Sept. 28, from 8 a.m. to 3 p.m. on Main St., Placerville.
A ZEN ZINGER: The “Zen” calendar offers the following Yogi wisdom: “If the world were perfect, it wouldn’t be.” — Yogi Berra
Send your jokes and event items for Heard Over the Back Fence column three weeks in advance to Bob Billingsley at the Mountain Democrat, PO Box 1088, Placerville 95667, or drop them off at 2889 Ray Lawyer Dr. First and last name of contact person are required. Phone 530-344-5036. Follow @BBillingsleyMtDemo on Twitter.