GOVERNMENT LOGIC: Wendy and Paul Chafer provided the following “Feel Smarter” statement: “Your food stamps will be stopped effective March 1992, because we received notice that you passed away. May God bless you. You may reapply if there is a change in your circumstances.” — Department of Social Services, Greenville, S.C.
SHOW N’ SHINE TIME: The 24th annual “Show N’ Shine and Fly In” is scheduled for Saturday, Sept. 28, with the following schedule: Entrance & Set-Up at 7 – 9 a.m.; Car Entries Close at 9 a.m.; Pancake Breakfast from 7 – 10:30 a.m.; Lunch from 11 a.m. to 2 p.m.; Judging 10 a.m. to 12 p.m.; Awards Ceremony at 2:30 p.m. Cars and airplanes will be on display. Food, music and vendors will be available. Proceeds will benefit local youth programs. Admission is free. There is a $3 parking fee. This event will be at the Cameron Park Airpark in Cameron Park. Enter on Fairway, off Oxford. For more information, call 916-933-8205.
STORYTIME AT THE LIBRARY: The El Dorado Storytellers Guild presents “Storytime” for children, ages 3 to 5 years, on Sept. 30 at 10:30 a.m. at the Cameron Park Library, 2500 Country Club Drive. All children, all ages, are invited.
TEENAGERS’ COMMUNITY SERVICE: Are you a teenager, looking for a way to complete your community service hours? You can join the Cameron Park Young Adult Library Committee and have a say in what the library provides for you and others your age. The committee meets on the second Tuesday of each month at 4:30 p.m. at the Cameron Park Library, 2500 Country Club Dr.
JAMMIN AT THE SENIOR CENTER: The El Dorado Hills Senior Center offers guitar and ukulele jam sessions. The uke jam session is on Mondays from 2 to 2:45 p.m. The guitar jam is held on Thursdays from 2 to 2:45 p.m. The drop-in fee for both sessions is $5. Jam participants should know the basics of the instrument and not be a brand-new beginner. Lessons for beginners are available at a different time.
HEALTHY LIVING CLASS: Marshall Medical is sponsoring a class titled “Healthy Living Class, Diabetes Essentials, Carbohydrates and You.” Class topics include the following items: What diabetes is — Controlling blood glucose levels — Using your meter effectively — Carbohydrates and diet — Meal planning — Managing your weight. This class will be presented on Tuesday, Oct. 1, from 1 to 3 p.m. in Cameron Park. For exact location information, additional information or to register for this class, call 530-672-7021.
EDUCATORS WORKSHOP: The American River Conservancy is sponsoring a workshop for educators, teachers and administrators. The workshop is titled “Connecting Nature and Art” by utilizing drawings, photographs, prose, music and 9 a.m. to 12:30 p.m. poetry Saturday, Oct. 5, at the Wakamatsu Tea and Silk Colony Farm. To sign up, contact Molly Hucklebridge at email@example.com or 530-621-1224.
LIVELY STORYTIME: ”Toddler Time” is a program that “encourages early literacy skills through songs, rhymes and stories. Each session will end with a hands-on sensory activity.” Two- and 3-year-olds are invited, with their adults. Classes are scheduled on Tuesdays at 11:30 a.m. at the Placerville Main Library, 345 Fair Lane.
NEW RACQUET LADIES: Hangtown Women’s Tennis Club extends a warm welcome to new members Meliza De La Rosa, Patt Tibbetts, and Sharon Denton. Remember, ladies, keep the ball in play and allow your opponents to screw it up!
BURMA SHAVE INFORMATION: Jewel Blair-Smith forwarded the following Burma Shave sign statement: “Don’t stick your elbow out so far, it may go home in another car.”
ART AND WINE FESTIVAL: The “Art and Wine Festival” is scheduled for Saturday, Oct. 19, from 4 to 6 p.m. in historical downtown Placerville. Thirty foothill wineries will offer samples of their wines inside merchant locations. Also, local artists will feature their works in local galleries. The “Banners on Parade” community art project will be displayed on Main Street and sold during the silent auction in the evening. There will also be music at the Belltower, art demonstrations and hors d’oeuvres, too. Tickets are limited for the wine tasting and are available at Main Street merchants or by visiting placerville-downtown.org.
NO LOGIC IN FOOD: Someone dropped off the following “Some Good Questions . . . Why?” for me: “Why do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet Coke?” I suspect they are hoping the diet Coke somehow makes up for the burger and fries — my kind of logic!
A DALAI DILLY: The “Insight from the Dalai Lama” calendar offers the following sensible advice: “Every day, think as you wake up, “Today I am fortunate to be alive; I have a precious human life; I am not going to waste it. I am going to use all my energies to develop myself, to expand my heart out to others, to achieve enlightenment for the benefit of all beings. I am going to have kind thoughts toward others; I am not going to get angry or think badly about others. I am going to benefit others as much as I can.”
Send your jokes and event items for Heard Over the Back Fence column three weeks in advance to Bob Billingsley at the Mountain Democrat, PO Box 1088, Placerville 95667, or drop them off at 2889 Ray Lawyer Dr. First and last name of contact person are required. Phone 530-344-5036. Follow @BBillingsleyMtDemo on Twitter.