Heard over the back fence: DA soiree Friday at Cafe Capanile

MORNING COMES TOO EARLY:
 John Chapman provided the following T-shirt statement: “I could be a MORNING PERSON, if morning happened Around Noon.” John and I agree with this statement. Don’t call us before 9:30 a.m.

HELP FROM THE DA’s OFFICE: On March 8, from 5 to 7 p.m., District Attorney Vern Pierson and members from his office will be at Cafe Campanile, 4359 Town Center Blvd., El Dorado Hills. The “Swole Patrol” will be hosting a fundraiser and will present the money raised to Operation Rebound at the end of the Bataan Memorial Death March on March 17. All five members of the “Swole Patrol” are current or former members of the United States Military — Deputy DA and retired Sgt. Brandon Erickson, District Attorney Vern Pierson, DA investigator Bill Dillard, as well as Cadets Sam Pierson and Nick Chung, who will commission as 2nd lieutenants in the United States Army in June of 2013. Aligned with Operation Rebound, Vern and his team aim to raise money for permanently wounded military personnel, veterans, and first responders in order to provide them the opportunity to rebuild their lives. Come on out for a great dinner for a great cause!

USED WEDDING DRESS FOR SALE:
 Carlyn White sent the following ad, which appeared in a U.K. newspaper: “WEDDING DRESS FOR SALE. Worn once by mistake. Call Stephanie.”

ARTISTIC HELP NEEDED: 
Artists are needed to submit their designs for the printed banners that are displayed on Main St., Placerville, light poles from June to October. Applications are due March 15 and are available at www.placerville-downtown.org or by calling 916-985-8996. Artists, designers, architects and art students are invited to submit designs.

EDHS ALUMNI LUNCHEON:
 The El Dorado High School Alumni Association is having their 33rd annual luncheon on Sunday, March 10, at the new American Legion Building, 4561 Greenstone Rd., Placerville. Anyone who attended El Dorado High School is welcome. For more information or a reservation, please call Susan (Frizzell) Meyer at 530-622-5881 or Barbara (May) Luther at 530-622-1180.

DON’T WAIT TOO LONG:
 The “365 Stupidest Things Ever Said” calendar noted the following restaurant sign: “Please Wait to Be the Seat.” — Sign at the Spaghetti House restaurant in Hong Kong.

MANAGING YOUR DIABETES: 
Marshall Medical is presenting a class titled “Diabetes Education: Your Plan for Success.” The class is available on Thursday, March 14, from 1 to 3 p.m., in Placerville. The following topics will be discussed: Reducing your risk — Long-term complications; Exercise – Make it work for you; Staying motivated; Diabetes and emotions. The class fee is covered by most insurance plans, including Medicare with an MD referral. For location details and to register for this class, call 530-672-7021.

GLASSES FOR THE NEEDY: 
Mother Lode Lions member Mitzi Stockel informs us that the Lions members collected 243 eyeglasses for the needy last quarter. Thank you to everyone who donated glasses.

METAPHOR EXPLANATIONS: 
A new class titled “We’re Not in Kansas Anymore . . . Introductions to Metaphor” will be available on Thursdays, April 4 to April 18, from 9:30 to 11:30 a.m., at the El Dorado Hills Senior Center, 990 Lassen Lane. The facilitator is Pam Stoddard from New Arenas. The class description notes you will learn about experiences and potentially apply the world of metaphor to your life journey. The deadline for registering for this class is March 27. To register, call 916-358-3575.

FISH STORIES GALORE:
 Guess what? The El Dorado Bass Club is accepting new members. This club’s purpose is to provide an atmosphere of camaraderie while sharing and learning bass fishing techniques. Club members fish 10 to 12 tournaments a year at various lakes and Delta locations. For more information, visit Website eldoradobass.com or call Tony at 530-676-5871.

“NON, JE NE REGETTE RIEN”: 
The French Connection Club is a social club that meets on the first Friday of the month from 10 to 11:30 a.m. at the El Dorado Hills Senior Center, 990 Lassen Lane. This fun group meets to practice the French language, recall your heritage, sing French songs, eat French foods and go on outings that feature French history. Club leaders are Terry Provenza, 916-941-9342, and Ellen Weinbaum.

CHRONIC PAIN WORKSHOP:
A free, six-week “Healthier Living” workshop is being provided by Dignity Health on Wednesdays, April 3, 10, 17, 24, and May 1 and 8, from 5:30 to 8 p.m. at the El Dorado Hills Senior Center, 990 Lassen Lane. Topics to be discussed include information if you suffer from diabetes, arthritis, depression, heart disease, chronic pain, anxiety or any other chronic condition that affects your life. Space is limited. Call 916-358-3575 to save your spot.

A DALAI DILLY:
 Thumbing through the “Insight from the Dalai Lama” calendar, I came upon the following optimistic prediction: “I am optimistic that the ancient values that have sustained mankind are today reaffirming themselves to prepare us for a kinder, happier 21st century.”

Send your jokes and event items THREE WEEKS IN ADVANCE for Heard Over the Back Fence column to Bob Billingsley at the Mountain Democrat, PO Box 1088, Placerville 95667, or drop them off at 1360 Broadway. First and last name of contact person are required. Phone 530-344-5036. Follow @BBillingsleyMtDemo on Twitter. 

Bob Billingsley

Bob Billingsley writes Heard Over the Back Fence three times a week, keeping his pen on the pulse of the community. He also writes a biweekly column called Billingsley's Bullets, in which he uses “sideways” thinking to make your day a little easier to handle.

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