YOU ARE WHAT YOU ARE? My pal John Chapman sent the following T-shirt statement: “If at first you don’t succeed, failure might be your thing.”
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DANCE THE NIGHT AWAY: The Shingle Springs Community Center will be hosting dance nights on the first Friday of each month. The next dance is scheduled for Sept. 6 from 7 to 9 p.m. Music will be provided by DJ Jamie Faw, and light refreshments will be served. A $5 donation is welcome. Come on out to the Community Center, 4440 South Shingle Rd., Shingle Springs, and join the fun! For more information, call Maria Brugger at 530-306-4614.
SUPPORTING BEN YURKOVIC: A blood drive to support Ben Yurkovic is scheduled for Saturday, Sept. 7, from noon to 5 p.m.,. at the Pollock Pines/Camino Community Center, 2675 Sanders Dr., Pollock Pines. Walk-ins are welcome. Bring a photo ID. Please eat and drink before donating blood. For more information, call 916-453-3039.
HUGE COMMUNITY GARAGE SALE: The El Dorado Hills Community Garage Sale is scheduled for Saturday, Sept. 7, from 8 a.m. to noon, at the Community Services District parking lot (corner of El Dorado Hills Blvd. and Harvard Way), El Dorado Hills. You can sell your items for a space fee of $35. To rent a space, call 916-933-6624.
HAPPY LABOR DAY: Does this mean I don’t have to do any household chores today?
NEEDLE LADIES UNITE: The El Dorado Hills “Nite Knitters” meet on the second Monday of each month from 7 to 9 p.m. at the El Dorado Hills Senior Center, 990 Lassen Lane. Beginners, with no experience, are welcome. Walk-ins are welcome, too. Leal Thompson is the leader of this group. For more information, call 916-358-3575.
TAKE IT EASY: A new class titled “Light and Easy Exercise for Seniors” is scheduled for Mondays from Sept. 9 through Sept. 30 at the Cameron Park Community Center, 2502 Country Club Dr., from 10:30 to 11:30 a.m. This class combines low impact moves, use of chairs and body bands, props and fun themes. The enthusiastic instructor is Susan Keema, AKA “Miss Susie.” Susie is a delightful person to be around. The class fee is $30 for Cameron Park residents or $35 for non-residents. To reserve your spot and to pay your fee, call 530-677-2231.
MUSIC AT THE RIVER: On Sept. 13, 14, and 15, the seventh annual American River Music Festival will take place in Coloma, with at least 30 live music performances. For tickets, camping information, performer’s biographies and the complete schedule and information about this “celebration of music and moving water,’ go to americanrivermusic.org or call 530-622-6044. Fun for all ages will be available at this entertaining festival.
BUY BARGAIN BOOKS: The Cameron Park monthly used books sale is scheduled for Saturday, Sept. 14, from 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., at the Cameron Park Library, 2500 Country Club Dr. Everything is on sale for $5 a bag. For bags of hard-cover books only, when you buy 1 bag, you get another bag free. Book donations are needed, especially paperback books. You can bring your donated books to this sale or drop them off at the library.
THANKS FOR THE MEMORIES: This new class, “Thanks for the Memories,” encourages participants to share anything they want to discuss. This class fills quickly. This group will meet on Tuesday, Sept. 17, from 1 to 4 p.m., at the El Dorado Hills Senior Center, 990 Lassen Lane. Geri Haskins will be the group leader. Call 916-358-3575 to reserve your spot.
HOW TO CHOOSE SUPPLEMENTS: A class titled “How to Pick the Right Supplements for You” is scheduled for Tuesday, Sept. 17, from 7 to 8:30 p.m., at the Cameron Park Community Center, 2502 Country Club Drive. This class “will reveal how to choose the correct supplements and how much is needed for maximum benefit.” Percy McManus will be the instructor. The class fee is $27 for Cameron Park residents or $32 for non-residents. For more information, call 530-677-2231.
POWERS OF ATTORNEY PRESENTATION: Attorney Diana Steele will be at the El Dorado Hills Senior Center, 990 Lassen Lane, on Tuesday, Sept 17, at 1 p.m. Her presentation will be “Powers of Attorney — What They Are? What They Do?” Call 916-358-3575 to reserve your spot. Also, appointments are available on the second Wednesday of the month to meet with Diana in El Dorado Hills.
FIRE DEPARTMENT PRESENTATION: On Friday, Sept. 20, at 1 p.m., Ben Cowles from the El Dorado Hills Fire Department will be speaking at the El Dorado Hills Senior Center, 990 Lassen Lane. His topics will include: “CPR and Stroke Awareness; Changes in local EMS Care and what they mean to you; What to expect when you call 911.” Call 916-358-3575 to reserve your spot.
OUTDOOR MOVIE TIME: Filmfare will present the movie, “The Day the Earth Stood Still,” on the grass at the Placerville Library, 345 Fair Lane, on Saturday, Sept. 21, at 7:45 p.m. Patricia Neal and Michel Rennie star in this movie. This movie is a “landmark sci-fi drama about a sophisticated alien who lands with a warning for earth.” Bring your lawn chair and blanket. Donations are welcome.
DON’T WASH EVERYTHING: If you look at the “365 Stupidest Things Ever Said” calendar, you will observe the following “tech support” statement: ”Tech support: Can you think of anything you might have done to cause your computer to stop functioning? Customer: Well, I just cleaned it. There was dirt on the fan, and I wiped it off. Tech support: Oh, that shouldn’t have hurt anything. Customer: Then I opened up the computer and wiped the insides as well. I took it apart and washed everything with Windex.” — Actual tech support call. At least the caller didn’t put the computer in the dishwasher!
CHEROKEE LIFE LESSONS SPEECH: I will be speaking on the topic “Applying Cherokee Life Lessons to Your Life” on Tuesday, Sept. 24, at 1 p.m., at the El Dorado Hills Senior Center, 990 Lassen Lane. You will learn about making decisions and how to move forward in your life. Seating is limited. Call 916-358-3575 to reserve your spot.
CONGRATULATIONS, KAREN AND MIKE: Did you see the picture of Mike Gregor holding the $289,341 check from the Powerball ticket he won? From now on, I will be introducing myself as “Karen Gregor’s best friend.” Karen is Mike’s wife.
A DALAI DILLY: Look over the “Insight from the Dalai Lama” calendar, and you will locate the following thought: “Helping others is not limited to providing food, shelter, and so forth, but includes relieving the basic causes of suffering and providing the basic causes of happiness.”
Send your jokes and event items for Heard Over the Back Fence column three weeks in advance to Bob Billingsley at the Mountain Democrat, PO Box 1088, Placerville 95667, or drop them off at 2889 Ray Lawyer Dr. First and last name of contact person are required. Phone 530-344-5036. Follow @BBillingsleyMtDemo on Twitter.