BE ON TIME FOR DINNER: John Chapman provided this T-shirt quotation: “A tardy cannibal gets the cold shoulder.”
NEW LOCATION FOR FUNDRAISER: Because of structural work being done on the Mother Lode Lions Club in Diamond Springs, the Friends of El Dorado County Seniors will move their 1 p.m.-5 p.m. March 16 spaghetti feed fundraiser to the Diamond Springs El Dorado Volunteer Firefighters Memorial Hall, 501 Main St., Diamond Springs. The following new location information and more is offered: There will be no bar. Tickets are $10 per adult and $5 for children under 10 years of age. To purchase tickets, you may send your check to Friends of Seniors, PO Box 564, Placerville 95667. For more information, please call Ruth Ann at 530-644-8519 (Friends of Seniors), or Pat at 530-622-7121 (Fire Safe Council), or Robin at 530-622-4848 (MORE).
ST. PATRICK’S PANCAKE BREAKFAST: The Gold Trail Grange is presenting a community “St. Patrick’s Pancake Breakfast” on Sunday, March 16, from 8:30 to 11 a.m., at 319 Highway 49 in the Marshall Gold Discovery State Park in Coloma. There will be free parking at the Grange. In addition to all-you-can-eat pancakes, you can enjoy an egg topped with a serving of corned beef hash, a seasonal fruit cup, orange juice, coffee, tea or cocoa. Tickets are $6. Kids under 10 eat for $3. Proceeds benefit the Grange building and scholarship funds. You can wear something green, if you like, even though we are a day early.
OPEN YOUR LIPS: Carlyn White sent me the following “Impossibilities in the World” quote: “You can’t say the letter “P” without separating your lips.”
SIERRA WILDLIFE RESCUE CLASSES: Sierra Wildlife Rescue’s March classes include the following presentations: “Songbird First-Aid” on March 11, from 7 to 9 p.m.; “Rehabbing Rabbits” on March 15, from 1 to 3 p.m.; “Doves and Pigeons” on March 16, from 10 a.m. to noon. All classes are held at SWR’s Wildlife Center, 3030 Newton Rd., Placerville. Classes are free for SWR members. A $5 donation is requested from the general public. To reserve your spot, call Barbara at 530-621-2650. Parking is limited, so please make your reservations ASAP.
CREATE A UNIQUE PRESENT: Novice crafters or experienced fusers are invited to a “Fused Art Class,” scheduled for Monday, March 10, from 6 to 8 p.m. at the Town Hall, 549 Main St., Placerville. Participants will make an 8-by-8-inch glass weaved basked plate. Reserve your spot by calling 530-642-5232 or by visiting the Placerville Recreation and Parks Dept. at 549 Main St.
BINGO IN THE PINES: You can play bingo on Tuesdays, March 11, 18 and 25, at the Pollock Pines-Camino Community Center, 2675 Sanders Dr., Pollock Pines. There is a $10 buy-in for the first 14 games. For more information, call 530-647-8005.
LOCAL WILDLIFE CLASS: Sierra Wildlife Rescue is offering a repeat of the “Introduction to Local Wildlife” class for prospective rehabbers. The class will be held on March 18 from 7 to 9 p.m. See SWR item above for contact information.
BREAST FEEDING CLASS: Marshall Medical is sponsoring a class titled “The Breast Feeding Experience.” Participants will learn techniques and positions and how to handle breast feeding challenges. Classes are scheduled for March 12 and May 15 from 6 to 8 p.m. Call 530-626-2990 for location, other information, and to register for class.
CAN’T LIVE IN THE FAST LANE: Read the book “Live and Learn and Pass It On,” and you will find the following life lesson: “I’ve learned that whenever I’m in a big hurry, the person in front of me isn’t.” — Age 27
BUSINESS SHOWCASE: The El Dorado County Chamber of Commerce is sponsoring a “Business Showcase” on Friday, March 14, from 4 to 8 p.m., at the El Dorado County Fairgrounds in the Forni Building. Come on out and meet our local business people. Food, wine and beer tastings will be available. Admission is free. You will also learn about our film industry at the “I Love Film Mixer.” For more information, call 530-621-5885.
REPUBLICANS LUNCH: The El Dorado West Republican Women Federated will meet on March 10 at 11:15 a.m. at Denny’s Restaurant, Coach Lane, Cameron Park, for lunch. The speakers will be Mike Ross, representing Assembly Woman Beth Gaines (6th District) and Trish Sweeney, representing Frank Bigelow (5th District). For more information, call 530-676-8380.
BON VOYAGE BALL: The Placerville Bon Voyage Ball is scheduled for Saturday, March 22, at 6 p.m. at the El Dorado County Fairgrounds, Placerville. Tickets are $70 per person. Ticket information available at www.placervillerotary.org or any Placerville Rotarian.
A ZEN ZINGER: The “Zen” calendar presents the following quote: “Simplicity is making the journey of this life with just baggage enough.”—- Charles Dudley Warner
Send your jokes and event items for Heard Over the Back Fence column three weeks in advance to Bob Billingsley at the Mountain Democrat, PO Box 1088, Placerville 95667, or drop them off at 2889 Ray Lawyer Dr. First and last name of contact person are required. Phone 530-344-5036. Follow @BBillingsleyMtDemo on Twitter.