LAWYERS IN COURT: A book titled “Disorder in the Court” lists statements from court reporters’ notes, such as the following: “ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual? WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard. ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female? WITNESS: Unless the circus was in town I’m going with male.”
PLACERVILLE SWIM TIME: The Placerville Aquatic Center, 3071 Benham St., has the following swim times and fees: PUBLIC SWIM: May 31 – Sept. 1 — Saturdays 11 a.m-3:15 p.m; Sundays 1-5:30 p.m.; Holiday (Sept. 1) 1-5:30 p.m.; June 2 – Aug. 8, Monday-Friday, 1-4:30 p.m. EVENING FAMILY SWIM: June 9-Aug. 8, Monday-Friday 7:05 – 9 p.m. ADMISSION: Ages under 1 free; Ages 1-7 $4; Ages 18-54 $6; Ages 55+ $4.
USED BOOKS SALE: We just received information that the Pollock Pines Library will have a used books sale in the library foyer between July 22 and July 31 during regular business hours, Thursdays from noon to 7 p.m. and Wednesday and Thursday from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. Hundreds of books will be for sale for $5 a bag. For more information, call 530-644-2498 or e-mail email@example.com.
ART WEDNESDAYS: “Art Wednesdays” are scheduled every Wednesday. Session 1 is noon to 12:45 p.m. Session 2 is 1 to 1:45 p.m. The July 23rd session is titled “Self-Portraits.” All sessions will be at the El Dorado Hills Library, 7455 Silva Valley Parkway. All ages are welcome.
HONOR LIFE: John Bruno forwarded the following “Life’s Little Instruction Calendar” quote: “Every day is a gift. Every meal is a feast. Every friend is a celebration.”
RELAY FOR LIFE TIME: Relay for Life of Placerville has scheduled a “Pre-Relay Survivors and Caregivers Party” at the Rainbow Orchards, 2569 Larsen Dr., Camino, on Saturday, July 26, from 10:30 a.m. to 1 p.m. All cancer survivors and their caregivers are invited. Please RSVP by calling 530-306-5013.
BEEKEEPERS WORKSHOP: Beekeeper Serge Labesque is presenting a class on Sunday, July 27, from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., at the Placerville Senior Center, 937 Spring St. “Serge Labesque, longtime beekeeper, has apiaries in the Sonoma foothills, teaches beekeeping at Santa Rosa Junior College, and has authored many published articles. Labesque, whose organic approach to beekeeping is to replicate what bees do in nature with minimal human intrusion and no chemicals, set about designing a hive that emulates the trees that bees have been living in for 45 million years. Learn more about bees and beekeeping at this lively, interactive class.” This class is being sponsored by the El Dorado Backyard Beekeepers and is open to the public. Class fee is $35 per person, which includes lunch. Please send a check to: El Dorado Backyard Beekeepers c/o Bernard Ruzicka, 3360 El Dorado Royale Dr., Cameron Park 95682, or pay through PayPal at Eldoradobeekeepers.com. Any questions, please call Laura Costa at 916-747-7440.
NEW TIME FOR BINGO: On the second Tuesday of each month, from 6 to 7:30 p.m., the Cameron Park CSD and New West Haven Assisted Living offer bingo games at the Cameron Park Community Center, 2502 Country Club Dr. You pay $3 for two cards and $1 for each additional card for a maximum of four cards.
TAILGATE SALE: A “Tailgate Sale” is scheduled for Sunday, Aug. 3, from 8 a.m. to noon, at the Shingle Springs Community Center, 4440 South Shingle Rd. This is an opportunity to sell your treasures from the back of your car or pickup. A $10 per space charge is required. For more information, call Pat Johnson at 530-677-2269.
CAN THIS BE TRUE? “Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader” calendar offers the following information: “You’re five times more likely to be in a car accident at 35 mph than you are at 65 mph.”
MEET YOUR NEIGHBORS! CEDAPP (Community Economic Development Association of Pollock Pines) will host a National Night Out picnic inside local Firehouse 17 on Aug. 5 from 4:30 to 7:30 p.m. All residents, businesses and organizations are invited. This event is free for Pollock Pines residents. Bring your own chair. Free hot dogs will be a part of your homemade picnic, while supplies last. There will also be music and kids activities. Free safety and evacuation information will be offered. For more information, call Jeanne Harper at 530-613-1332.
LIBRARY FUNDRAISER: The ninth annual “Wine for Words” gala fundraiser for the Placerville Library will be held on Sunday, Aug. 17, from 4 to 8 p.m. at the library, 345 Fair Lane. Tickets are $50 each and include wine tasting, a catered dinner, silent auction and raffle. The guest speaker will be author Nancy Herman, author of “All We Left Behind: Virginia Reed and the Donner Party.” Tickets are available at the Placerville Library. If you would like to be a sponsor or make a donation, call 530-620-1647.
COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS: Thanks to Carlyn White, we offer the following “I Believe” quote: “The happiest of people don’t necessarily have the best of everything. They just make the most of everything they have.”
LEARN TO LINE DANCE: Line Dance lessons, new and old, are offered on Wednesdays from 1 to 2 p.m. at the El Dorado Hills Senior Center, 990 Lassen Lane. A $3 per class donation is appreciated. The class instructors are Pat Nathan and Shelly Mills. Drop-ins are welcome.
CRATER LAKE TRIP: The El Dorado County Senior Activities Program is offering a Crater Lake, Ore., trip from Sept. 8 through Sept. 11. The cost is $799 double or $1,024 single occupancy. For more information or a trip flier, call Star Walker at 530-621-6255 or e-mail firstname.lastname@example.org.
STROKE EDUCATION GROUP: A “Stroke Education and Support Group” meets on the fourth Wednesday of each month from noon to 1:30 p.m. at 681 Main St., Room 208, Placerville. Bring your brown bag lunch. For more information, call 530-626-2642.
A ZEN ZINGER: A glance at the “Zen” calendar offers the following thought: “Take the backward step that turns the light and shines it inward.” — Dogen
Send your jokes and event items for Heard Over the Back Fence column three weeks in advance to Bob Billingsley at the Mountain Democrat, PO Box 1088, Placerville 95667, or drop them off at 2889 Ray Lawyer Dr. First and last name of contact person are required. Phone 530-344-5036. Follow @BBillingsleyMtDemo on Twitter.