PROBLEMATIC PROVERB: If you cruise through the “365 Stupidest Things Ever Said” calendar, you will discover the following mixed-up proverb: “She’s just going to have to take the horn by the ears.” — Good Morning America legal analyst Robin Sax, about Lindsay Lohan’s addiction problems (thanks to Bill Roche).
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STOCK UP ON STEAK: Raffle tickets for a chance to win 108 pounds. of choice N.Y. strip, rib eye, pork loins, chicken breast, and filet mignon, plus a freezer to store it all, are available at Shingle Springs-Cameron Park Chamber of Commerce, 4095 Cameron Park Dr. (the Wells Fargo building). We just received this information, and today, June 19, is the last day you can purchase tickets. The drawing will be held tomorrow. For more information, call 530-677-8000.
WEDDING PHOTOGRAPHER SPEAKER: The El Dorado Camera Club will meet on Thursday, June 20, at 7 p.m., at the Cameron Park Community Center, 2502 Country Club Dr. Internationally published Kathy Durrett will speak about her extensive experiences with wedding portraiture. For more information about speakers and events, visit eldoradocameraclub.com. Visitors are always welcome.
FARMER’S MARKET FOR KIDS: The “Farmer’s Market Storytime” is for children ages 3 to 5 years old and is scheduled for Friday, June 21, at 10:30 a.m. at the Placerville Main Library, 345 Fair Lane. Kids will enjoy stories, crafts and fun!
TRAVELING BEE SHOW: On Wednesday, June 26, the Cameron Park Library will host the Summer Reading Club for children at the library, 2500 Country Club Dr. The presentation for this meeting will be “Uncle Jer’s Traveling Bee Show,” which begins at 10 a.m. For more information, call 530-621-5500.
AVOID RATTLESNAKES: On June 29 and 30, the Hangtown Kennel Club will sponsor its final Rattlesnake Avoidance Clinic, with a registration deadline of June 22. For more information or to register, call Cathy Keeler at 530-622-6909 between 6 and 10 p.m. or visit www.hangtownkc.org.
POETRY READ-AROUND: The “Poetry in Motion” group is sponsoring a poetry read-around on Monday, June 24, from 6 to 7 p.m., at the Placerville Senior Center, 937 Spring St. All ages are welcome to this free event. Bring your own poems, read from your favorite poets, and just come to listen.
DOG CLASS FOR SENIORS: A new “Dog Class for Seniors” will be offered on Tuesday, July 9, from 10:30 to 11:15 a.m., at Rasmussen Park. Bring your dog to the park and join Kerry McBride, operator of El Dorado Pet Club and dog trainer. Dogs need to be current for shots and vaccinations — provide paperwork at time of registration. You will need a 6-foot leash, no flex leashes, please. The class fee is $36 for Cameron Park residents or $41 for non-residents. To register, call 530-677-2231.
SWIM LESSONS AVAILABLE: Group swim lessons are now available at the Cameron Park Community Center’s swimming pool, 2502 Country Club Drive. Each session includes eight separate 25-minute sessions taught by CSD lifeguards. For cost and exact times of sessions, call 530-677-2231 or visit www.cameronpark.org. Private lessons are also available.
CONTROLLING YOUR DIABETES: Marshall Medical Center is sponsoring a class for diabetics titled “Gaining Better Control” on Tuesday, July 9, from 1 to 3 p.m., in Cameron Park. Class topics include the following subjects: Key tools for managing diabetes; Making sense of your blood glucose numbers; Medication options; Emotions & diabetes. For exact location information or to reserve your spot, call 530-672-7021.
LET GO OF THE PAST: Thanks to Clara Neilsen, we offer the following life lesson from the book, “Live and Learn and Pass It On:” “I’ve learned that I can’t change the past, but I can let it go.” — Age 63
BENEVOLENT BINGO: Bingo games are available at the El Dorado Hills Senior Center, 990 Lassen Lane. Raley’s Supermarket and the Nugget Market offer discount purchases on their $5 gift cards, which bingo players can win. Bingo is played on Mondays and Thursdays from 12:30 to 1:30 p.m. You pay $3 for 2 bingo cards. Additional cards are available for $1. For more information, call 916-358-3575.
DOGS WHO BEHAVE: The Hangtown Kennel Club is offering “Obedience and Conformation Classes,” July 11 through Aug. 15. For cost and location information, call 530-622-6909 in the evening.
A DALAI DILLY: The “Insight from the Dalai Lama” calendar offers the following thought: “Take into account that great love and great achievements involve great risk.”
Send your jokes and event items for Heard Over the Back Fence column three weeks in advance to Bob Billingsley at the Mountain Democrat, PO Box 1088, Placerville 95667, or drop them off at 1360 Broadway. First and last name of contact person are required. Phone 530-344-5036. Follow @BBillingsleyMtDemo on Twitter.